Top 10 Ways to Tell Your Husband You're Pregnant...when You're 58 years old.
February 20, 2008
Hey Dad,
This Mom needs our help. Here’s what she wrote: I do not know how to tell my husband I am pregnant and I was just thinking I should ask you guys for help to tell him I got pregnant a month ago. ~Jennifer (58)
So…I thought our advice should come in the form of a Top 10 Ways to tell your husband you’re pregnant…when you’re 58 years old.
This could be good…I mean helpful. So give it your best shot. Just post them below!
weiszguy
Feb 20, 11:57 AM
Are you serious? You got an email from a 58 year old, asking how to tell her husband she’s pregnant? Isn’t that some sort of record? She doesn’t have to tell him. Just wait for the TV crews to show up to make a news story out of her.
Mark
Feb 20, 12:07 PM
Ummmm….honey, remember when I was having all of those hot flashes we thought was menopause? Well, I think you better look at the furnace…
Angela
Feb 20, 12:07 PM
“Dear, you know how you have always admired Abraham and Sarah……..”
ethan demme
Feb 20, 06:36 PM
1. Honey when were you planning on retiring?
2. Um about that vacation last month…
3. Just when you thought you quiver was about to be empty…
4. Who said 8 kids was too many?
5. Honey you may want to take the “for sale” sign of the minivan
6. For our fortieth anniversary it’s tradition to get Rubies well were getting something that rhymes with that ;-)
7. Remember you were talking about how quiet the house had gotten?
8. We’ve alway said we wanted grand children well your parents are going to get another one
9. You know how I said I was getting fat… well it’s only temporary
10. Look on the bright side, now we can get a kids and an AARP menu as shoneys :-)
Doug Hobbs
Feb 21, 02:44 PM
What’s for dinner? Mint chocolate chip and a big kosher dill!
Rob Alfred
Feb 21, 03:11 PM
Honey, do you remember how I have not been feeling well lately? Well the doctor says that I have the Egyptian Flu. He said it’ll last for nine months and then I’ll become a Mummy.
David
Feb 21, 03:19 PM
“You ‘da Dad!”
Tammy
Feb 21, 03:52 PM
Buy him Father of the Bride, part 2.
Jeanne
Feb 21, 04:01 PM
Dear, remember the Pastor talking about using our gifts. Well, I believe God gave you the gift of being a great father. Nothing in our lives is accidental or a mistake. Honey, God has given you another opportunity to use your gifts for him. Congratulations Dad!!
Jim
Feb 21, 04:06 PM
Let me tell you about this blessing we just received . . .
Lonny Gulden
Feb 21, 05:11 PM
Let’s assume Jennifer already has three children and her husband’s name is Bob …
Have Bob stand up and say, “All you Dads with 3 kids take one step forward, Bob, not so fast!
Jeff
Feb 21, 05:22 PM
Honey! You’ve still got it!
Scott
Feb 21, 05:47 PM
Hi Honey, the doctor says we’re going to have another uncle…
Joel
Feb 21, 06:08 PM
Honey, Do you remember how we thought we would be bored during retirement? Well, good news! Retirement is going to have A LOT of excitement!
Jason Reed
Feb 21, 06:37 PM
Honey…Do you want to push the cart with the Diapers or the cart with the Depends.
Tom
Feb 21, 07:31 PM
Honey,
I’ve found you a housemate that you have a lot in common with. You both eat soft foods. You both wear diapers. You both drool. And you both will rely on me till I’m dead.
Jason Reed
Feb 21, 07:43 PM
Honey…. If you can push the baby out by 1:00pm we can still get to the Post Office on time to pick up your Social Security check.
Nate
Feb 21, 07:46 PM
“Honey…Do Winnebagos come with infant seats?”
Carol Reed
Feb 21, 08:41 PM
Eating out should be cheap. Senior menu for us, and kids eat free.
Dottie Halter
Feb 21, 08:45 PM
You know how they always say children keep you young….( from a 50 year old woman who’d love to have such great news to share with her hubbby. After all we only have 10 kids so far.)
TimM
Feb 21, 08:55 PM
Let me tell you a story… One day my wife asked me if I had had a dream. I said no & that ended the conversation. That nite I had a dream that she was great with child. The next day I told her about my dream & asked her if she was expecting. She shyly said yes & told me that she had asked God to give me a dream because she didn’t know how to tell me. Our youngest son was 8 years old. All I could say was “Wow”. So Justin, our 5th child, born in my 44th year is our Wow Baby.
Darren Seibert
Feb 21, 09:18 PM
Honey, I was thinking that we should take up a new hobby. Yeah you’re right, we’re to old for that. Better stick with a hobby we are already good at. Did I mention your going to be a Dad again? Oh I forgot to set out some ground beef for dinner.
Jim Cessna
Feb 22, 12:22 AM
Top Ten Ways To Tell Your Husband You’re Pregnant When You’re 58 Years Old
1. “When you’re done with Sunset Magazine,can you get the crib out of the attic?”
2. order 2 senior meals and a happy meal at McDonalds
3. trade his riding mower for a stroller
4. put all of his stuff from the office (Junior’s old room) in the garage
5. blindfold him and take him to a surprise LaMaze breathing class
6. Tell him that he can’t eat all the Gerbers you’ve been stockpiling
7. “Hey stud! Guess what…”
8. tell him he’s a really great grandfather but was a really good father before that and….you know…..it’s just…..well…..I’m Pregnant! – there I said it.
9. tell him you’ve got some shopping to do at Really Old New Parents R Us
10. meet him at the door wearing nothing but maternity panties and a nursing bra and let him come to his own conclusion
MikeC
Feb 22, 06:42 AM
Hey Honey, Remember watching that game and a Viagra commercial came on and you said … and I thought to myself “Oh my Lord, not again after 30 years…” Well guess what happens thanks to Big Pharma and they’re miracle drugs? Do they list this as a side effect? Can we sue’em?
Bill F
Feb 22, 09:42 AM
“Hey Hon, You have to check this site out. It’s called ‘top-10-ways-to-tell-your-husband-youre-pregnantwhen-youre-58-years-old’
You go ahead and start reading, I have to go potty… again!”
PastorGregg
Feb 22, 10:57 AM
Honey, I’ve always admired the way you live by God’s Commands. I especially appreciate your willingness to obey His command to,“be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth”. So we’re going to obey God again and do some multiplication! Aren’t you happy Honey? Honey?
chris
Feb 22, 11:24 AM
Do you really mean 48? I think 56 is the world’s record. She could say, Guinness call today honey, we’re in the book. Could you please pass the coffee, decaf, please.
patricia
Feb 22, 12:35 PM
God is soooo gracious and full of mercy. He also has a wonderful sense of humor. We got our gift before the ages of Abe & Sarah. He is always on time!
Shawn Loy
Feb 22, 02:05 PM
May I lead our Bible study tonight? I’ll read Genesis 15:1-6 then you read 17:1-8,15-19 and I’ll finish up with 18:1-5,9-14.
Finally, we’ll close with a meditation on Psalm 127:5 considering this question: is this a promise or a command? “Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them…”
all the Genesis verses are listed here, btw….http://www.dltk-bible.com/kjv/genesis_15.htm
Mick L
Feb 22, 03:38 PM
Hey all you slugs….
How about some excitement . love compassion.
God has a plan?
What great new’s!
{If he’s any kind of Man}
Jonathan in North Dakota
Feb 22, 03:41 PM
Honey, remember how the pastor asked us all to pray about contributing to the growth of our church? We’re personally involved. :-)
Cincy Dad
Feb 22, 04:58 PM
Most of the comments are clever, but in the event she wants something a bit more serious, I would suggest an approach that is direct and God centered:
“I need your help. Most importantly, I need your support and understanding. I don’t really understand God’s plan here, but apparently he intends to bless us with a(another) child. We’re pregnant.”
Mike D
Feb 22, 06:17 PM
Honey, you didn’t really want to be alone during our retirement, did you?
Dan P
Feb 25, 11:26 AM
Honey do you you know how much a breast enhancement costs?… Well this one is only temporary and will take about 18 years to pay off!
Beef
Feb 25, 04:37 PM
Honey,
Remember how we discussed our mistakes raising the kids and how we would have changed a few things? God gave us the chance to get it right!
Jay5
Feb 25, 08:13 PM
You want have to complain that your children want let you spend any QT with their children
JDC
Feb 27, 08:36 AM
Honey, guess what, we are going to get an extra $300 in tax rebates this year! Let him figure it out from there ;-)
Cathy
Mar 9, 11:03 PM
Leave the positive pregnancy test on the bathroom sink & pray, pray, pray… (I had my 7th at 46).
Ginny
Mar 13, 02:46 PM
Take a stuffed toy rabbit and hang it from the neck on the front porch and put out a sign “The Rabbit DIED!”
Patricia
Apr 9, 06:38 AM
Thank you for planting your seed.
Chuck
Apr 9, 10:51 PM
Just say “You know I always dreamed of a shot-gun wedding … so lets renew our vows now before the baby comes …”
terry
Apr 16, 11:23 AM
roses are red,violets are blue, the class of 2026 will soon have special meaning to you..
Brendan
Apr 23, 11:00 PM
Honey, remember how you complained about not having any tax deductions? Well, say hello to a child tax credit!
Katie
May 14, 04:29 PM
If you have other kids… buy the youngest a white tee shirt and write with a sharpie “I’m Going TO Be A Big Brother/Sister!!” then have him wear to do something special with dad! It worked for me… (Of course I am only 28 and it was our 6th child)
Mike
Jun 4, 12:15 AM
Those pregnancy tests look an awful lot like a USB flash drive. Slip one into his computer drawer, and when he tries to insert it into the computer, he can flip it over to read the note that says “I’ll bet you were so surprised to find that I had switched your USB flash drive with a pregnancy test!”